I’ve always been the reliable one in the family, the one everyone could count on. But I never expected that reliability to mean being taken for granted. When my family planned a lavish cruise to Hawaii for my aunt’s retirement, I was completely left out of the loop. I discovered the trip by accident when my sister mentioned it in passing. When I asked why I wasn’t included, the answer was both simple and insulting: they all assumed I would happily stay behind to watch their toddlers and babies while they enjoyed a tropical vacation.
I’ve always been the reliable one in the family, the one everyone could count on. But I never expected that reliability to mean being taken for granted. When my family planned a lavish cruise to Hawaii for my aunt’s retirement, I was completely left out of the loop. I discovered the trip by accident when my sister mentioned it in passing. When I asked why I wasn’t included, the answer was both simple and insulting: they all assumed I would happily stay behind to watch their toddlers and babies while they enjoyed a tropical vacation.
Upon my return, I faced a wave of criticism and blame. They called me irresponsible, but I believed they were the irresponsible ones for assuming I would cancel my life for their convenience. To ensure this never happened again, I sent each family member a postcard with a list of professional babysitters’ contact information. It was a clear message that my time is valuable and my participation in family events is not a given—it requires communication and respect. The lesson was learned, even if it took a missed vacation to teach it.
